Our third applicant for "The Farmer Takes A Wife" is...
Hello! I'm Carolyn Still. Perhaps you've seen me on another reality show, The Next Yummy Channel Star? I was dang good on that show, I'll tell you what! I would have won, too, if it hadn't been for that skinny little aerobic-instructor health-food nut-case. She was way too skinny to be a decent chef. I can't believe the judges chose her mediocre cooking over my fabulous menu.
Welcome, Caroly...
But enough about her, this is about me! I would be so awesome on this show. I could totally go for a farmer that's been educated. I mean, really, who better to know how to grow exactly the right ingredients for my fantastic cooking? And who better for a man than a woman who can cook, after all? I can always send him to Paris for a makeover if I don't like his hair. I see, well could you please... 
I'm not ALL about cooking, although I do claim it as my biggest passion. I love to have a good time. I love going out on the town, dressed in my best. Something about eating out at other chef's restaurants makes me feel good about my own cooking, since I know my dishes are usually better than theirs, so I like to go out and go dancing or something afterward because I am just .that. good.
I'm not ALL about cooking, although I do claim it as my biggest passion. I love to have a good time. I love going out on the town, dressed in my best. Something about eating out at other chef's restaurants makes me feel good about my own cooking, since I know my dishes are usually better than theirs, so I like to go out and go dancing or something afterward because I am just .that. good. I believe we can safely say that humility...
So, I think you should choose me for this show because I am the best woman for this job. I can cook, keep a man happy, make excellent use of garden-grown produce and I look good on camera, too. (cuts in) Thank you Carolyn!
*motions to cut video feed* 
My yes, some applicants were just too good to let pass by.
6 comments:
Let pass by? *chuckle* I think they got stuck with her because the poor producer couldn't get a word in edgewise to tell her they weren't accepting her application.
*waits for the next applicant*
*cackles* My goodness! A woman like this would totally steamroll over poor James ... or whatever the farmer's name is. I keep forgetting. *LOL* WOO!
Carolyn Johns? She sure talks A LOT! She got in by default? Hmmm, let's see how she does.
Boy, Carolyn sure comes out with a bang and all, doesn't she! Hehe, poor Mimi can't get a word in edgewise! *cackles* Think any of the other contestants will be able to say a thing when she's in the house? :-)
Wow. Conceited much? James needs peace & quiet after a hard day of farming, not Chatty Carolyn.
she's quite self confident *snickers* wow.. i wonder how she fits in that chair with her ego! sheesh!
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